And I want to thank my many friends and readers for making that magick happen. You have made ALL my wishes and dreams come true! We have plane tickets, we have the nights in the hotel, we even have wedding bands! Who would have known when I thought my dreams were crushed and we would not be able to get married that people would donate money to help it all happen?
Years ago I read a science fiction story in which a man is about to board a spaceship and head out to the stars. Before he leaves he stops at a space station and he has dinner with a married couple--two men. I smiled, I sighed, I said, "Two men married?? Ah well, it's science fiction. And who knows, maybe one day...?"
And now, in two weeks I will be legally married...to a man. It's real! "R" and I will be legally married!
You know, I am married. I have been since November 5th 2005. Since November 5th, 2005. Many of you were our witnesses! I couldn't be more committed, more with "R" than I am now.
But it isn't "legal." We have none of the rights that every married couple has. Do you know how it feels to have to check off the "Single" box on every legal document I've ever have to sign? Medical papers. Hospital stays. Employment paperwork. Petitions. Everything? My taxes each year? Do you know what that FEELS like? Every time I feel like I have betrayed and denied my husband. There is a sick feeling in my stomach and my heart aches.
I know a lot of you have followed this convoluted journey through my Facebook, but for those of you who haven't...here is the catchup. "R" and I work for this woman who was going to spend a weekend in Baltimore. Her husband's gay brother was getting married. But they decided to wait a year and our friend had already paid for the weekend and couldn't get the money back. Not sure why. So she asked us if we wanted the weekend! And we said, "Hell, yes!"
And "R" pointed out we could get married! So we made calls and found out that we had to be there two week days. We were arriving in Baltimore on a Saturday and leaving on a Monday. Not two week days!
So I made phone calls and found out if we filled out this affidavit and we took it too the Kansas City Circuit Court and had them sign the paperwork then we could skip a day and get married on the Monday we are in Baltimore. ALL the paperwork was is KC saying we are who we say we are. They look at our ID and verify that we live in KC. It is not permission to marry. It is not a marriage licence. Just verification that we are BG and "R."
No one in KC would do anything. No one would sign it. The City Councilor for KC said it was because no one wanted to stick their neck out. Stick their neck out!
I was crushed. I posted my story on Facebook....
....and I was shocked when I got home the next evening from work and found out that on of my readers/fans had set up a fun for us on the Internet and people were raising money so we could afford to stay the extra time in the hotel and change our plane tickets we can get married.
And many of you have donated! Thank you thank you thank you my friends! Thank you!
"R" and I were talking the other night and I said something like, "I plan on being with you the rest of my life...."
He said: "You better, that's why I am going through all this trouble to marry you."
I made a silly off-handed comment about how people do get divorced. And HE said, "No. No divorce. We do this and it's forever."
For a man who isn't very romantic, now and again he hits one out of the ballpark! I am so in love. No wonder I can write romance. I believe in it. And I believe in love.
And I believe in my fellow human being. I have seen overwhelming kindness and generosity. Over the last weeks I've spoken of the things that would make my wedding day perfect and people are making all my wishes and dreams come true. Plane tickets...all paid for. We bought wedding bands! Real gold, REAL wedding bands. I wanted anyone who looked down at my hand to know I was married.
And friends and my readers and people I've never met and may never, ever meet donated money and are making all of it come true!
And the magic continues!! Yes, it does!
I called the Baltimore Hyatt Regency last night to reserve the second two nights and got this heterosexual man who went on and on about happy he was for us. He started fixing everything and got us a really wonderful rate...and told us we had a city view.
Me: Is the city view better or the harbor view.
Him: Oh, the harbor view! But I can't get you all the discounts on that....
Me: Oh. Well, that's okay. (Then yelling down to R in his man-cave I tell him what happened).
"R": Which do you want? The harbor view or the city view.
Me: Well, the harbor view of course, but come on! How selfish am I supposed to get?
"R": We'll get the harbor view then!
Me: (to the Hyatt Man) He said it was okay to get the harbor view.
Him: Okay...but hmmmmmm....you might have to change rooms because the two nights that were gifted to you are city view.
Me: Okay then--never mind. Believe me, I am MORE than thrilled.
Him: Hold on a minute.... (puts me on hold a long time)
Him: Mr Thomas? I just spoke to the manager and I have it all fixed. You have a harbor view, for a hundred dollars less a night than I quoted you, and I have told them it's your honeymoon and they are going to make sure it's prefect!
This is meant to be! That worry I had about the layover? Pshaw! This is meant to be!
Thank you! I want to thank all of you who have wished us well and who contributed to the campaign. http://www.youcaring.com/other/let-s-help-one-of-our-own/188169
With all the love in my heart!
With all the love in my heart!